For Posterity's Sake

I was listening to my favorite playlist this morning when the song "Wish You Were Here" by Pink Floyd came on.  And as it always happens when I hear a Pink Floyd song, thoughts of my dad began to flood my mind.  (Pink Floyd was one of his favorite music groups.)  I sure miss him.  And it got me thinking how I wish I knew more about him.  I mean, there is a lot I do know and remember about him.  Like how I know some of his favorite candies were Jordan Almonds and Necco Wafers. And he didn't chew gum unless it was Beeman's or Black Jack.  I know he really liked oranges, but couldn't stand strawberries.  He just couldn't get past the seeds.  (And yet he liked raspberries and black berries.  Thats my dad for you!)  ;)  I know he liked to laugh, and tease us kids endlessly.  And he loved to hear other people laugh.  I know he liked adventure.  Growing up, there were a lot of times we would all hop in the car and just drive and see what we could see.  There were many times my dad was so busy looking at all the scenery, he would swerve all over the road.  There were a few times he nearly drove right off the road!  I remember a few times being in a car that was driving behind him, and we would see his car swerve on the road, and we'd say, "Dad must be checking out the scenery again!"  I know how my dad loved to watch his sports.  There was always football (Broncos fan all the way!), and basketball (Denver Nuggets, unless they were playing the Utah Jazz, then forget it Nuggets), then baseball and hockey came to Colorado with the Rockies and the Avalanche, and that was it.  Sports on TV all year round.  And if there weren't any sports on, a little WWF was in order.  (And that was when I would escape to my room to read a book.)  :)  I also know how much he loved my mom, and how much he was loved by her.  Those are just some of the things I know/remember about my dad, to name a few.  The things I wish I knew are things he would have to tell me.  Like how he felt on his wedding day.  Or what his thoughts were the first time he saw my brother and I.  Or what things did he worry about while my brother and I were growing up?  The kinds of things you never think to ask your parent when you're a kid.  He died when I was just 22, and prior to his death I guess I thought we would have a lifetime with him.  You never think life is going to be cut short, until it is.

Anyway, as all of these thoughts were going through my head, and of course knowing my dad isn't here to ask him or talk to him about these things, it made me want to be a better journal writer.  This blog is my journal.  I do write occasionally, but it is sporadic at best.  We never know when our time in this life will come to an end, and I want my kids to be able to look back at things I have written and be able to know my thoughts and feelings about events in my life.  Or even just the events for that matter.  So I have determined to do better, and to start writing down things I have never taken the time to record.  For posterity's sake.  :)

Brotherly Love

Imagine a grown man, about 26 years of age, two small children, ages 6 and about 3, and a teenager, oh, probably anywhere from 13-15 years old, driving along in a pickup truck on a quiet back road on their way from Orem to Provo. Imagine said grown man, Scott, say to the teenager, Mike (Scott's youngest brother), "Hey I bet you couldn't jump out and run alongside the truck while it's moving at 10 miles an hour." Mike responds back with, "Sure I could." Scott, "No, you couldn't." Mike, "Yes I can." At which point, Mike opens his door, and starts getting into jumping position. My dad, Scott, again says, "You won't do it." Next thing we know, Mike is no longer in the truck, and we feel a big BUMP in the road. Now imagine that same truck screeching to an abrupt halt. Yes the bump in the road was indeed my uncle Mike. Luckily the truck only ran over his shoulder and not his head. So back in the truck goes uncle Mike, and we rush to the nearest E.R. Mike has a broken bone in his shoulder (go figure). I remember sitting there next to my dad when the doctor came out and asked, "Well sir, now how did this happen?" Silence for a moment, then "Ummmm... Uhhh."

The Funny Lookin' Cow

I have been thinking about my dad a lot lately. Its funny how I'll go for a bit and not think of him too much, and then other times I can't stop thinking about him and some of the funny things he used to do.

Today as I was driving on the back roads to go run some errands in Parker, I was reminded of the back roads my dad used to take us on sometimes to get from our home in Orem to my great grandma Menlove's house in Provo. My brother and I used to love it when dad would take the back roads because that meant we would get to stop and look at what we endearingly named 'the funny lookin' cow'. Funny looking was putting it mildly. It looked like a cross between a cow, a yak, an oxen, and who knows what else. Let me put it this way... it looked like someones breeding experiment had gone horribly wrong. Whenever we were going to grandma Menlove's, my brother and I would beg to go the back way. More often than not, my dad would humor us. I think he liked seeing the cow just as much we did, if not more so. We wouldn't just drive by either... My dad would almost always stop, and we would get out and go stand by the cow's corral and just sit and stare at it for a while, comment on how funny it looked, then head on our way to grandma's house. I'm grateful for a dad who would take time to stop and smell the roses... er, I mean, stop and gawk at the funny looking cow.

My Dad

I was thinking about my dad this morning, and just remembering what a funny guy he was. He had a really funny sense of humor, and he liked it when he could make you squirm a little bit.

When I was about 14-15, I used to love to pull the car into the garage. Now you have to understand that from the time I was seven or eight, I was counting down the years, months, days, until I could drive a car. I think just to get me to shut up, my mom let me start pulling the car into the garage. She probably was thinking twice about her decision the day I accidentally stepped on the gas instead of the brake. We had a big huge freezer against the back wall in the garage that took the brunt of the impact, but I did manage to put a nice sized hole in the dry wall behind the freezer. At least the car didn't go all the way through the wall to the patio, right? Anyway, this all happened while my dad was at work, and I was really worried he was going to furious at me, so I begged my mom not to call and tell him. It's not like he wouldn't notice when he got home anyway. When my dad got home from work that night, I was at a combined Young Men/Young Women's activity, so I didn't get to see his reaction. He made sure he was the one who came and picked me up that night. He walked into the gym at the church, and in a very loud voice (so everyone was sure to hear) he said, "Let's go Kiffon. The cops are at the house looking at the damage you did to the freezer and the garage." I could have just died! My own dad called the cops on me! Well, not really. Like I said, my dad loved when he could make you squirm. He let me think the worst (was I going to go to jail?) for about a minute or so before he totally busted out laughing. He thought he was so funny. Actually, being a parent now myself, I think it is hilarious, but at the time, I could have died of embarrasment. After hearing him tell the story to others several times, I think he was actually proud of the perfect indent I left of the license plate on the front of the freezer.

In Loving Memory

Today would have been my dad's 50th birthday. He passed away a little over seven years ago at the young age of 42. While those seven years have seemed like a lifetime, I know that compared to eternity, it is but a blink. I am so grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and for the atonement, and for the knowledge I have that I will be able to see my dad again. I can't imagine having to go through this life without that knowledge. My testimony of the gospel is the only thing that brought me peace and comfort during the difficult time of my dad's passing, and on those days when I miss my dad so much it hurts, it is what continues to bring me that peace. I rejoice in the knowledge that I will see my dad again. I rejoice in the fact that I can be with my family forever through the blessings of the temple.
My parents were sealed in the temple when I was about 12. It is a day I will always remember. I remember the difference I felt in our home after that. Things were always pretty great for me growing up. I always knew that I was loved, and my needs were always taken care of, but there just seemed to be a different feeling in our home after my parents went to the temple. Things that were already great became better. We just seemed to become more connected as a family. My parent's relationship changed as well. The love they felt for each other grew and deepened. Even I, as a 12-13 year old at the time noticed a difference in them. I am so grateful for the changes my parents made in their lives and for the steps that they took so that our family could be sealed together for time and all eternity. I am grateful for their example to me, and because of that example, I too have been to the temple and sealed to my husband and children.

I miss my dad for so many reasons, but one of the things I miss the most is watching him be a grandpa. When Trent and I told our parents that we were expecting our first baby, my dad was in such denial. In his mind he was nowhere near old enough to be a grandpa. Well, by the time my pregnancy was nearing it's end, my dad just couldn't wait for that baby to come. He kept telling everyone at work, "I'm out of here as soon as I get that phone call, I don't care what's going on around here." After Trenton was born, my dad became known as "The Baby Hog". If my dad was around, he always had the baby, and he was never very willing to let anyone else have a turn. Reflecting back on it now, I'm so glad that he was such a baby hog with Trenton and Colson because he got to spend so little time with them here on this earth. I remember at his funeral, in the closing prayer my uncle Larry gave, he prayed that Trenton would be able to remember his grandpa so that he could tell his little brother about him. To this day Trenton will every now and then, out of the blue, say something he remembers that he and grandpa used to do together. Which to me is amazing because Trenton was only 2 1/2 when my dad died. I have always been so grateful for that prayer.

While life without my dad is really tough at times, especially knowing how lonely my mom is without him, I take comfort in the fact that I will see him again. I just think of him as our guardian angel, watching over us in ways that he wouldn't be able to if he were still here on this earth. I love you dad, take care... until we meet again.